Today you learn that your “I-AM-SO-HAPPY-JOY-PEEK!” smile, is not clear to other people and that, instead, they see something more like, “THAT-SCARY-NOT-ME-CRAZY-STUPID-FEAR-BAD-KNOW-NOT-YET-KILL-HATE-GIRL-IS-STARING-AT-US!”
…or whatever. But today you decide you just need to go with crazy.
Today you walk by Chris Palmer at lunch with your arms outstretched wide like your smile…
And today… still nothing.
But, TODAY, he notices and says, “Why are you doing that?”
And you face him directly. And pause carefully before you answer. (So he will remember the smile part later.) And you split-grin-smile and you GUSH out your mouth, “I AM A PLANE!”
And he just shakes his head and walks away.
...let your tongue drip down my neck.
razor taste buds chopping at my skin.
tiny chewing chainsaws.
i am smeared across your chin,
swallow pieces of me slowly.
thousands of tiny black fists.
rising up in a wave of thick-tar darkness.
crashing screaming knuckles against my skull.
help me.
wet indifference.
bubbles up from my center.
fighting to spill out my eyes.
i cage it violently with a smile.
too thick to leak between my teeth.
help me rip me tear me break me rape me cut me kick me hit me hate me.
slice me open, i don't care.
just touch me somehow.
i want to suck your insides out.
i want to put them in my mouth.
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